*Power for the soul*

I've been called cliche too many times to count. But I wouldn't have it any other way. So, I've compiled some of my favorite quotes and sayings. The ones that really strike and empower my soul.

From me to you-- here are some simple words that hold a much greater meaning. May you find a personal connection to each one.


"To all the girls that think you're ugly because you're not a size 0, 
you're the beautiful one's. It's society who's ugly."
-Marilyn Monroe

"That's the thing about needs. Sometimes, when you get them met...
you don't need them anymore."
-Carrie Bradshaw

"If you're always trying to be normal you will never know how amazing
you can be."
-Maya Angelou

"Don't become a stranger to yourself by blending in with everyone else."
-Dodinsky

"Don't be so hard on yourself. Please be gentle. Speak to yourself in more loving
and encouraging ways. Your inner dialogue is the most powerful voice you hear.
Turn down the volume of the critic.
-Christine Hassler

"True forgiveness is when you say THANK YOU for that experience."
-Oprah Winfrey

"Remembering that you are going to die is the best way to avoid the trap of
thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no
reason not to follow your heart.
-Steve Jobs

"Maybe it's hard to believe what's with my obvious charm and good looks, but
people used to think that I was a monster. And for a long time..I believed them.
But after a while, you learn to ignore the names people call you. Just trust who 
you are."
-Shrek

"I'm scared of everything. I'm scared of what I saw. I'm scared of what I did,
of who I am..and most of all, I'm scared of walking out of this room and 
never feeling the rest of my life, the way I feel when I'm with you.
-Baby, Dirty Dancing

"Achievement is by dictionary definition a product of struggle."
-Dan Kennedy

"You can't win a marathon without putting some band-aids on your nipples."
-Dave Harken, Horrible Bosses

"There's a reason I said I'd be happy alone. It wasn't 'cause I thought I'd be 
happy alone. It was because I thought if I loved someone and then it fell apart,
I might not make it. It's easier to be alone. Because what if you learn that you need
love, and then you don't have it? What if you shaped your whole life around it, and 
then it falls apart? Can you even survive that kind of pain? Losing love is like organ
damage. It's like dying. The only difference is death ends. This? It could go on forever."
-Meredith Grey, Grey's Anatomy

"Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up. If a guy punches you, he likes you. Never
try to trim your own bangs. And someday, you will meet a wonderful guy and get your
very own happy ending. Every movie we see, every story we're told, implores us to wait for it-
the third act twist..the unexpected declaration of love..the exception to the rule..But sometimes
we're so focused on finding our happy ending, we don't learn how to read the signs. How to tell
from the one's who want us and the one's who don't. The one's who will stay from the one's
who will leave. And maybe, a happy ending doesn't include a guy. Maybe..it's you..on your 
own..picking up the pieces and starting over..freeing yourself up for something better in the
future. Maybe the happy ending is just..moving on. Or maybe the happy ending is this..
Knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken hearts...through the blunders
and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment..you never gave up..hope."
-Gigi, He's Just Not that into You.

"But the thing is, it's hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely, because almost everyone
has that smallest bit of faith and hope..that one day, they would open their eyes
and it would all come true. At the end of the day, faith is a funny thing. It turns up
when you don't really expect it. It's like one day you realize that the fairy tale is slightly
different than your dream. The castle, well it may not be a castle. And it's not so important
that it's happy ever after--just that it's happy right now. See, once in a while, once in a blue
moon, people will surprise you. And once in a while, people may even take your breath away."
-Meredith Grey, Grey's Anatomy

"Some people pass through our lives for a reason. To teach us lessons that could never be
learned if they stayed."
-Mandy Hale

"Let someone love you just as you are. As flawed as you might be, as unattractive as you
might feel, as unaccomplished as you might think you are; let someone love you just as you are.
..And let that someone be- you.."
-Sandra Kring

"You are the answer. Brilliance, Beauty, Worth, Humor, Weirdness, Potential, Creativity..
Right there inside you are the ingredients for greatness. Don't burn the recipe."
-Kelsie Long

Walking contradiction !@#$%^&*

The thing about life is I'll never be sure about it. And maybe that's the beauty. Not completely understanding. But living anyway. 

There will always be moments, days, weeks, where I feel like I've failed. One day, I'll have this really great day. And the next day? Well, it may not be that great. Sometimes I change my mind, my feelings, my views. It's a roller coaster personality. But conflict within is imperfect. It's what makes us weird and unpredictable. And I love that. 

If everyone was sure about everything...life wouldn't be so spicy. And sometimes we all need that little kick, because it makes every second worth it. 

Open a Webster's dictionary. You won't find my name. You won't find yours either. We can't be defined. Because we are growing each and every day. With every challenge, tragedy, loss, and happy ending...we grow into this better version of ourselves. Always improving. Always changing. But never giving up. Never quite certain of what is to come. 

I've come to the conclusion that I just don't make sense. I've spent so much time trying to figure out who I really am. Having this belief that you have to know who you are. Preaching that in order to be whole you must love yourself. You must be secure with the person you are. What I've realized, though, is that this isn't true. 

The real truth is that insecurity is part of being a human being. And if all of us were secure in every aspect of our lives, this society would be perfect. Lindsay Lohan would never have tried drugs. Beyonce would never have made a movie, confessing to the world that even she doesn't feel confident sometimes. Politicians wouldn't have to pick each other a part for a vote. There would be more plus size models. And you wouldn't be reading this right now.

If each of us truly embraced who we are and loved our flaws...then we wouldn't wear makeup. We wouldn't flip on the TV only to see commercial after commercial marketing self-improvement products. Like the newest anti-aging cream. Or the magical mascara that will lengthen lashes. That will make you more beautiful than you already are.

The truth is, we are all a work in progress. Life is a work in progress. And we are all a little insecure. And what I've come to realize--is... that's okay.

In this great life, (and I do mean great), we are walking contradictions. Just remember- it's a human quality. And it's beautiful- just..like...YOU! 

Conversation, Google, and Grandpa.

Creativity gives me a way to contribute a little bit of my weirdness to the world. And I don't know what it is about a good old fashion "do it yourself" kind of project- but I LOVE taking something ordinary and making it quirky.

Bringing some much needed life back into used and forgotten items reminds me that nothing is a lost cause. It reminds me that there is an unconditional hope for anything and anyone. No matter how beaten up..or ugly..or unconventional..with some TLC and a smile it's totally possible. 

While scrolling through Google images, looking at ideas for decorating, I stumbled upon this super awesome end table made from recycled books. It was brilliant. And I thought, I have to try to do this! Not knowing the amount of brain power this new adventure was going to take.

After a hefty workout, my cousin Katie and I took a trip to our local Goodwill. Just so happens books were on sale for some ridiculously cheap amount. Score! We tried to grab for inspiring titles like, "Color your Future..Fearless and Flawless...City of Dreams..." I was going for an inspirational piece. 

I'm sure I looked completely crazy as I was creating this end table from this vision I had in my head. Right there, on the Goodwill floor...this thing was really starting to come to life! Woo-hoo! So, I ended up with about 20 books and a serious arm workout. 

Once I got the books home I realized this would be harder than I thought. I left them on the front porch for a solid week- pondering how in the heck I was going to pull this off. Then, I called the man who knows everything- my grandpa. He accepted the challenge without any questions. My dad lined up the parts needed. All I had to do was put them in my car and head over to grandpa's. 

My brother helped, too. He was designated driller. Grandpa was the brains behind the operation. And me, well, I guess I was just the one with the picture in my head. We worked for around 2 hours total. Drilling and gluing and cutting. It was the best 2 hours, ever! Bonding with my grandpa and brother. Working as a team. Laughing and cracking jokes. Figuring out the complicated end table together. Well, it was a memory that I'll always treasure. 

This "do it yourself" project turned into a "do it together" one...and I wouldn't have had it any other way. That book end table, that no one really understood at first, took on a new life. And gave me some unforgettable moments in return. And you can bet your bottom.. this conversation piece will stay in the family for awhile. 

Quality time. So simple. Yet, sometimes, so neglected. Getting caught up in our own schedules and not making time for those who are most important- well, it happens more often than it should. And I'm a repeat offender. But from now on, I'm going to try my VERY BEST to make time for my favorites. Because they are the ones who put the happiness in my heart and the genuine smiles on my face. 

So, thank you Google images...for reminding me that in this great life, the only thing guaranteed is time. So instead of watching it pass, let's make it count.

Wishing you a day as beautiful as you are!

 Completed Vision.

In my mother's eyes

In my mother's eyes I see hope. I see a genuine heart, who would do anything for anyone regardless of the circumstance. I see a woman who raised me with a tender hand and loving arms. I see undeniable beauty- not just superficial but deep inside her soul. Her spirit is unreal. I guess you just have to meet her to understand.

Unknowingly she guides and heals those around her. She's able to build such a connection with people- they swear they've known her forever. I don't know if it's her gentle smile or her attentiveness to everyone else's needs, but my mother is unlike anyone else in this world.

She's been an R.N. for around 25 years, working with Alzheimer's patients. And even though they have a tough time remembering, they remember my mom. Because she goes above and beyond mandated duties. She just loves them. That's all. But it makes such a difference in their fragile lives.

I look at her these days and think, "how could one person be so very remarkable and not even know it?" I think, "I am the luckiest girl in the world."

Though I'm sure I put a few of those gray hairs on her head, my mom has been my biggest fan. The best thing she's ever done for me is simple. She just loves me.

Mom, if you’re reading I just want to convey my deepest thanks. From the bottom of my heart. You always have the right words, no matter the situation. Thank you for those words.  I hope one day you’ll realize just how important you are in this great life. 

To my readers: 


May you feel inspired. May you live each day with a heart full of warmth and love. May you look in the mirror and smile at the person inside. And may you be blessed to have a mother like mine.

I found a note

I decided to get organized. So, I put on my hard hat and got to work. While rummaging through old papers and doing the annual purge, I found a note I'd written around the time I began this blog. This is what it said.

"There is a certain freedom in embracing the person inside. Not caring what whoever thinks. Not caring what whoever says. I spent so much time caring, yearning for acceptance. I wanted that special guy to come 'save me'. Well… I've played damsel in distress for way too long. Time to put on my big girl panties and love myself, free of outside input. There was this guy… okay, not just a guy. He was a really good friend. The only guy friend I've ever had, and frankly the only guy that’s ever made an effort to get to know me. We clicked. Had a lot of laughs, smiled till our cheeks hurt, and just had fun. The thing is I ruined our friendship. I ruined it because I started feeling these stupid feelings. I started getting butterflies, blushing, and being 'that girl'. You know- the one that brings a little vomit to your mouth, because watching her throwing herself @ said man disgusts you… yeah, her. I sacrificed a friendship because I’m human. BUT it served as a major learning experience. And I finally feel the beauty of moving on. I allowed him to control my mood and my emotions. WHO DOES THAT? Well, me. A girl who really genuinely cared. I sought advice from close friends. I shed many tears. I even was crazy enough to think he’d come back. Beg me to take him. Tell me he actually liked me more than just his friend. It didn't happen. And I wasted so many opportunities, so many experiences, waiting on a man who never wanted me. Wanting a man who never thought twice about me. Giving him control, again. There were repercussions, too. Emotionally- I didn't want to open up to anyone. Pushed people away. Avoided connection. 

The beauty of moving on—the wisdom follows you. Becomes a part of you. And the pain dulls and fades. Your heart miraculously repairs. It puts some Neosporin and Band-Aids on those wounds and screams “USE ME AGAIN!” So, here I am. 19 years old. Alone. And loving it. Here’s to living my life for ME. Here’s to loving myself FOREVER. HERE’S TO STARTING FRESH!"

After reading I felt a sense of pride. See, when we go through our highs and lows of life we sometimes forget that the wisdom we seek is right there-- inside of us. 

I hope you feel your own wisdom. May it be in the form of a note, a self-pep talk, or simply listening closely to your heart. Because whether you know it or not- things will get better. Know how I know? Easy. You're a beautiful person. And you will find your way.

I love you,

Kelsie. 

Smile from a stranger.

My mom went into Papa John's to pick up some pizza we ordered for New Year's. She was only going to be a minute, so I waited in the car. 

And as bitter as it sounds, I was having one of those days where I resented anyone who was happy. I just wasn't feeling that great about my life. I felt like I'd hit a dead end or something. Nothing necessarily bad had happened...but nothing good, either. Sometimes when that cycle of  "sameness" hits you- it seems like you're a negativity magnet.

There I was- in a feeling sorry for myself, thinking deeply about life, and worrying about stuff, kind of mood.

Basically, sulking for no reason. 

And there she was- this perfectly perky stranger, leaving Papa John's, balancing a pizza on her left hand. As she elegantly walked out the doors I remember thinking, "Wow, she's gorgeous. Hate her. Bet she has plans tonight..or some hot date. Bet her life is perfect." 

So...I stare at her, with jealousy, like this.

I expect her to equally glare back at me. But instead, she stares back like this.

I'm not exaggerating when I say that her smile was so genuine I caught myself smiling right back- without even thinking. Almost like a happy reflex. 

Talk about a moment where I felt like a complete a-hole for judging someone I didn't even know. Pegging her to be this person in my head, who was so much cooler than I was. Glaring at this stranger with distaste. Trying to convince her that I was better than her or something with one hateful glance. When, in fact, I was the jealous one. All because I was having an awful day. 

It's been almost 6 months since that smile from a stranger. But I'm continually grateful for her positivity. Because it really lit up my dark day. 

Who would've thought? One smile could change a person. 

To this day, when I'm walking down the street or through a store, and I come across a sour face (like mine earlier this year), I give that person the most genuine, caring smile I can muster. Because even though it's such a small gesture- it can really leave a lasting impact. And in some small way, I need to return the favor I was given on a rainy day. 

In this great life, sometimes it's the people who know nothing about you- that have the ability clear up your once foggy view of the world. Be that stranger to someone. Trust me, they will be forever touched.

Little mud to heal the soul: *one DIRTY adventure!*

It's been awhile, huh? I just haven't been in the writing mood lately. Maybe it's the catching up with old pals. Maybe it's the endless coffee and lunch dates (that I LOVE!). Or, maybe it's because for the first time in a long time, I've been busy adventuring! Can I get a woo-hoo for happiness? 

Recently, two of my very good friends and I ventured to Noblesville to participate in the Dirty Girl 5K mud run. I first read about the muddy fun in a Cosmo magazine my roommate bought. My first thought was, ahhh-there's NO WAY I can complete an obstacle course in the mud. But my inner runner said, "Go for it!" And that's what I did. 

Megan and Lynndsey (the daring dirty girls that weren't afraid of a little mud) ran with me. The best part was the totally non-competitive nature of the event. No timer. No pressure. Just strong women. Many survivors of breast cancer. Go survivors!!

When we arrived, I was a little apprehensive. The first obstacle I saw was this humongous pink slide with a mud pit at the end. My eyes bugged a little and I thought, "I've got to climb that?" But climb it we did, along with many other mudders.

BONUS: at every obstacle there were these holy-moley, hunkah-hunka, cutie pahh-tootie, tan and handsome men!! They facilitated participants through the obstacles. And man-OH-man...I was never so happy to be a participant. (wink) Just a side note, as I was covered in mud and looking a little--eh--crusty? I slipped down a hill and landed in the river. BUT, no worries. I fell into the arms of a God like creature, and he smiled at me! Heart=melted. Needless to say, this mud run is the MOST FUN I've ever had in my ENTIRE LIFE! 

As you know, I've been working on body peace. You know, loving me...all of me...forever. And it was at this crazy adventure where I honestly, truly, fully made peace with myself. I saw women. All shapes and sizes. Fearless. Celebrating their bodies. No judging.

I was surrounded by these inspirational people-who, despite the challenge, welcomed the impossible. And that, my friends, is revolutionary.

As we reached the end of the course we dove into our last mud pit.. swimming away the hatred for the bodies that got us there...rolling away the shame for our insecurities...embracing the very thing we've spent years degrading...making peace with the women we have become. Best moment of my existence. 

After that last pit, we entered the shower room. (basically, a big room with hoses) I saw women- stretch marks and all, bearing their skin...washing off the mud. Smiling with accomplishment. Exposing their vulnerability for all to see. With no shame. It was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. 

And for the first time EVER, I took my shirt off in public. Only a sports bra. Hosing my body down. Washing away the shame and embarrassment I've held onto for so long. Freedom. Finally. 

The room was getting packed, hoses were in demand, and we decided to walk out to the car to change. So I walked, to the car, exposed. My belly showing. My biggest insecurity- out there- for husbands, and children, and fellow mud runners to see. Something I wouldn't have been caught dead doing 24 hours ago. 

But I would never take that moment back. 

That mud run changed my life. And I'm SO HAPPY I decided to go out of my comfort zone. Because I'm a better person for it. 

This great life will throw journey's your way, without notice. And it'll be up to you to rise to the challenges presented. My advice, beautiful person reading this, is to take every single one of them. There's no doubt in my mind that through those journeys, you too will find peace. 

Snapshots from an unforgettable journey:

First obstacle I saw! eek. (so, fun.)

Finish. 

Amen to BODY PEACE!